Green Lantern
...ok where do I start with Green Lantern? I wanted to really like the movie...no, I take that back. I wanted to freakin’ love Green Lantern. I mean, I've been looking forward to the release of this movie for weeks...however, after watching it this weekend, I'm feeling extremely disappointed and robbed. It was just god awful. And, yes, I do mean awful. I put down all my criticisms below and hope I spoil it enough to save you all the trouble of watching it and wasting your time and money. You can thank me later.
Ryan Reynolds (Hal Jordan/Green Lantern) and Blake Lively (Carol Ferris) - Both are horrible actors. I mean...absolutely, downright, horrible. They have no emotion and no depth. Watching them play out the motions in this movie didn't do anything for me and did nothing to advance the storyline. And worst yet, they aren't even nice to look at. I mean, yes, it is Ryan Reynolds and Blake Lively (I'm not a fan of either of them)...so yes, I was concerned about watching these two in Green Lantern and was hoping that they'd prove me wrong and bring it...but sadly, they've got nothing. I mean, the most basic rule of being a good actor/actress is being able to sit there and look pretty...Ryan and Blake both fail.
Character Development - There wasn't any. Nothing. I was waiting for it...but it just didn't happen. Character development is important in any movie, especially super hero movies. You have to feel connected to the hero. You have to feel the struggle and the transformation of the character over the course of the movie. And in the end, you have to really believe in the hero and the journey. In Green Lantern...there was none of that. Hal Jordan is chosen to be the first human to have the powers that comes with being a Green Lantern. But the irresponsible, self-absorbed and arrogant ass that he is, can't seem to get over himself to save the world and just decides to give up halfway through the movie. I mean, in the end, he decides to be Green Lantern to get the girl…but not really to save the world…but whatever. He's suppose to be portrayed as untouchable and a badass...when in fact, he's just cocky, spineless and a coward. He makes you wish that you could slap the smug smirk off his face. It was bad.
Storyline - oh man...there are so many things wrong with the storyline of this movie. I don't even know where to start because it was so bad. Ugh. First, let’s start with the people that are introduced in this movie. Why do the writers introduce a concerned brother, a dotting nephew and a smart-mouthed best friend...if they didn't plan to put them into more than one scene? It's stupid. These characters show concern...but nothing comes of it. After you see them once, you don't see or hear about them again. So again, I ask, what's the point? Second, Hal's superpowers. How is it that Hal, this humanoid, is given these superpowers...and yet, has no problem using them?!?! There is no training...no adjustment period...no development. I didn't like that at all. It was just another missed opportunity for me to bond with the character. Third, Hector Hammond, the scientist guy, is not only the creepiest motherfucker I've ever seen, but he is Hal's biggest earth-lurking archenemy. However, in the "epic" showdown between Hal and Hector…it only lasts about five minutes...only to have Parallax (the universe's worst nightmare and Green Lantern’s universal enemy) kill Hector…which leads Carol Ferris to furiously type on a computer to, somehow, rescue Hal. I still have no idea how that happened...but it was just done so poorly that I didn't even care. And even worse, at the end of the movie, Sinestro (Green Lantern’s supporter/friendish person) arbitrarily puts on Parallax’s ring and hints at a sequel movie of him becoming evil…but you know what? By the end of this movie…I could give a shit about that and am starting to question my love for super hero movies all together.
Romance - I don't pay to see a movie like Green Lantern for the romance. I mean, if I wanted to see a romantic comedy, I would. The cheesy ass romantic storyline between Ryan Reynolds and Blake Lively was just terrible. The lines were corny, their chemistry was off and the "romantic" scenes were just laughable. I totally wasn't feeling it. It was as bad as the new episodes of Star Wars between Natalie Portman and Hayden Christensen. I really don't know why the Green Lantern writers wasted precious movie reel time to produce the romantic vomit crap that can be found in this movie.
Fight Scenes - But hey…when all else fails (i.e. dialogue, character development, storyline, etc.) in any action movie, trust in the fight scenes to save the movie and make it worth it, right? Wrong! Fight scenes? What fight scenes? Struggle? What struggle? In the final fight scene (what is suppose to be the ultimate climax of the movie) Hal "tricks" Parallax into following him into the sun...where Parallax winds up being sucked into the sun and burning to death...WTF…really?!?! Wow. I'm surprised the entire freakin' Green Lantern Corps. (a whole brotherhood of warriors formed by the different races from entire universe sworn to keep intergalactic order) didn't think to do that...What a concept. Ugh. It was just so freakin' terrible.
OK...there you have it. That’s my review of Green Lantern. Take it for what you will...but don't say I didn't warn you.
Ryan Reynolds (Hal Jordan/Green Lantern) and Blake Lively (Carol Ferris) - Both are horrible actors. I mean...absolutely, downright, horrible. They have no emotion and no depth. Watching them play out the motions in this movie didn't do anything for me and did nothing to advance the storyline. And worst yet, they aren't even nice to look at. I mean, yes, it is Ryan Reynolds and Blake Lively (I'm not a fan of either of them)...so yes, I was concerned about watching these two in Green Lantern and was hoping that they'd prove me wrong and bring it...but sadly, they've got nothing. I mean, the most basic rule of being a good actor/actress is being able to sit there and look pretty...Ryan and Blake both fail.
Character Development - There wasn't any. Nothing. I was waiting for it...but it just didn't happen. Character development is important in any movie, especially super hero movies. You have to feel connected to the hero. You have to feel the struggle and the transformation of the character over the course of the movie. And in the end, you have to really believe in the hero and the journey. In Green Lantern...there was none of that. Hal Jordan is chosen to be the first human to have the powers that comes with being a Green Lantern. But the irresponsible, self-absorbed and arrogant ass that he is, can't seem to get over himself to save the world and just decides to give up halfway through the movie. I mean, in the end, he decides to be Green Lantern to get the girl…but not really to save the world…but whatever. He's suppose to be portrayed as untouchable and a badass...when in fact, he's just cocky, spineless and a coward. He makes you wish that you could slap the smug smirk off his face. It was bad.
Storyline - oh man...there are so many things wrong with the storyline of this movie. I don't even know where to start because it was so bad. Ugh. First, let’s start with the people that are introduced in this movie. Why do the writers introduce a concerned brother, a dotting nephew and a smart-mouthed best friend...if they didn't plan to put them into more than one scene? It's stupid. These characters show concern...but nothing comes of it. After you see them once, you don't see or hear about them again. So again, I ask, what's the point? Second, Hal's superpowers. How is it that Hal, this humanoid, is given these superpowers...and yet, has no problem using them?!?! There is no training...no adjustment period...no development. I didn't like that at all. It was just another missed opportunity for me to bond with the character. Third, Hector Hammond, the scientist guy, is not only the creepiest motherfucker I've ever seen, but he is Hal's biggest earth-lurking archenemy. However, in the "epic" showdown between Hal and Hector…it only lasts about five minutes...only to have Parallax (the universe's worst nightmare and Green Lantern’s universal enemy) kill Hector…which leads Carol Ferris to furiously type on a computer to, somehow, rescue Hal. I still have no idea how that happened...but it was just done so poorly that I didn't even care. And even worse, at the end of the movie, Sinestro (Green Lantern’s supporter/friendish person) arbitrarily puts on Parallax’s ring and hints at a sequel movie of him becoming evil…but you know what? By the end of this movie…I could give a shit about that and am starting to question my love for super hero movies all together.
Romance - I don't pay to see a movie like Green Lantern for the romance. I mean, if I wanted to see a romantic comedy, I would. The cheesy ass romantic storyline between Ryan Reynolds and Blake Lively was just terrible. The lines were corny, their chemistry was off and the "romantic" scenes were just laughable. I totally wasn't feeling it. It was as bad as the new episodes of Star Wars between Natalie Portman and Hayden Christensen. I really don't know why the Green Lantern writers wasted precious movie reel time to produce the romantic vomit crap that can be found in this movie.
Fight Scenes - But hey…when all else fails (i.e. dialogue, character development, storyline, etc.) in any action movie, trust in the fight scenes to save the movie and make it worth it, right? Wrong! Fight scenes? What fight scenes? Struggle? What struggle? In the final fight scene (what is suppose to be the ultimate climax of the movie) Hal "tricks" Parallax into following him into the sun...where Parallax winds up being sucked into the sun and burning to death...WTF…really?!?! Wow. I'm surprised the entire freakin' Green Lantern Corps. (a whole brotherhood of warriors formed by the different races from entire universe sworn to keep intergalactic order) didn't think to do that...What a concept. Ugh. It was just so freakin' terrible.
OK...there you have it. That’s my review of Green Lantern. Take it for what you will...but don't say I didn't warn you.
Posted by kristina
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